I’m pretty sure I’ve posted the lyrics to this song as a blog on Myspace a long time ago. I remember I went to Target the day Knuckle Down came out in 2005. I immediately put the CD on and this song fucking spoke to me word for fucking word. I mean, I feel like Ani Difranco sat me down and asked me about my life and then wrote a song about it. I don’t think any song hits me like this one does. I was on an Ani kick yesterday (still am actually) and I can’t help but rack my brain when I hear this song.
I am out here studying stones
Trying to learn to be less alive
Using all of my will
To keep very still
Still even on the inside
I’ve cut all of the pertinent wires
So my eyes can’t make that connection
I am holding my breath
I am feigning my death
When I’m looking in your direction
‘Course numb is an old hat
Old as my oldest memories
See that one’s my mother
And that one’s my father
And that one in the hat, that’s me
It’s a skill I’d hoped to abandon
When I got out on the open road
But any more pent up emotion
And I think I’m gonna explode
There’s never been an endeavor so strange
As trying to slow the blood in my veins
To keep my face blank
As a stone that just sank
Until not a ripple remains
I am high above the tree line
Sitting cross legged on the ground
When all of the forbidden fruit has fallen and rotted
That’s when I’m gonna come down
‘Course numb is an old hat
Old as my oldest memories
See that one’s my mother
And that one’s my father
And that one in the hat, that’s me
It’s a skill I’d hoped to abandon
When I got out on the open road
But any more pent up emotion
And I think I’m gonna explode
I tried to find the video of Ani performing this song on Conan but I had no such luck. Here’s the best video I could find. Enjoy:
